Hello and welcome to my blog.
We all have a child within us and that child can occassionaly pop up with messages & memories of our childhood. If the memories and messages are positive then all is fine. Sometimes however, it can also make us aware of some not so good memories. For those of us who grew up in dysfunctional families, the child within needs healing as sometimes it had overly critical and neglectful parents.
I have started this website to share my personal story of recovery, healing and hope. I want to offer tips on how to cope with a special needs sibling and how to heal from narcissistic parental abuse. I also want to offer insight into how complicated the grieving and healing can be when recovering from chilhood abuse and neglect in the family. Mental health is very important to myself and others and people have to understand that it matters just as much as physical health.
I hope to reduce the stigma of mental health.
A short summary of my background is written below and I hope that you will stop by and share your thoughts with me.
I am recently married and in my early 30’s and very grateful to have come across WordPress. I don’t consider myself a writer, but I have always kept a journal as a way of getting my thoughts & feelings out of my head and onto paper. In this case, I am obviously hoping that my thoughts and experience will be seen by others and can hopefully help them. Even if I can only reach out to 1 or 2 people, that is enough to make this blog worthwhile. .
I am bi-cultural and spent the first 18 years of my life in the suburbs of Athens. I have an older brother who has epilepsy and has the mental age of a 10 year old. He has many difficulties in learning, spatial & quantitative awareness and self-care. He lives in the UK and is looked after by carers. I am glad he has some support.
Unfortunately, due to many reasons which I will list below, I have struggled throughout my life so far with low self esteem, generalised anxiety, complex post traumatic stress & depression. I am behind emotionally in a lot of areas in my life, especially in feeling safe with intimacy and trusting people and constantly feel worried about most things in my day to day life. This is a result of my dysfunctional upbringing. I am currently in the latter parts of my healing journey and have grieved extensively.
I knew something was not ‘quite’ right from the tender age of 7, when I asked my parents if I was adopted. Things didn’t feel right at home, so I wondered if there was another ‘loving’ family out there somewhere. I grew up with 2 narcissistic parents so my childhood wasn’t normal. I didn’t have other family around, so felt very alone growing up! Nobody understood how hard it was to be the sister of a special needs sibling, or to be the daughter of 2 ’emotionally handicapped’ parents. I use the term ’emotionally handicapped’ as that is truly how it feels when your parents can’t comfort you when you are sad,understand you or love you unconditionally. When your childhood has a lot of drama, arguing, threats, lies and abuse, you are a victim of abuse who then becomes a survivor.
Unfortunately I was unlucky enough to experience other traumatic events, such as a sexual assault, an armed robbery where someone got shot, a home burglary, earthquakes, a car accident, my sibling and father attempting suicide and constant abandonment in both my family and previous relationships. I also unfortunately had 2 relationships with narcissistic men, as they resembled my family and that is all I knew. For these above reasons my PTSD is complex.
I have been recovering for 7 years and still finding it hard completely letting go of my dysfunctional family.
My biggest success was to marry my lovely husband after 3 years of being together. He is incredibly gifted ( in the highest IQ range) and even though some of his sensitivities and dramatic reactions, resemble my family of origin, he is healthy, loyal, trustworthy and loves me unconditionally. It was extremely difficult for me at first to persevere every time I wanted to run or give up, as he didn’t feel familiar like my previous partners did. It took me a long time to believe I deserved to be loved and to trust that I wouldn’t be abandoned again. With the help of psychotherapy, I identified my triggers, fears and self destructive behaviours. I am still learning to take a step back and not react when triggered but this is a long process and still working on it. It has all been worth it and I am extremely grateful for all the support and self awareness I have managed to maintain.
I hope you find my posts a little interesting or insightful and I would be very happy to hear from you with any questions about your own struggles. I am not a licenced psychotherapist, qualified coach or mental health professional. I have however worked in caring jobs for over 13 years, which include child care, special needs care and elderly care. I would like to eventually do a masters in Art Psychotherapy but until then I will continue to write, create art and learn as much as I can.I am hoping to gain some other training in life coaching and possibly trauma work. I have currently chosen anonymity to protect myself. I hope you feel comfortable enough despite this to say Hi and share your story or thoughts.
Thank you for sharing your story. Best of luck
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Thank you Kitt! I really appreciate it!
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I look forward to reading, sounds intriguing!!
-Paul
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Hi. Welcome to my blog and thanks for the
follow 🙂
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No problem! 🙂 Will look forward to reading more posts.
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Hello , what a brave soul you are, thank you for the follow I look forward to reading your blog!
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Thank you so much for your kind words! Happy Christmas xx
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and the same to you and yours. ❤
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As one my precious followers, I’ve nominated you for the Blogger Recognition Award.
https://dialogueftdepths.wordpress.com/2016/01/14/the-blogger-recognition-award/
When you visit next, I’d love if you could leave a comment – hint, hint 😉
(not really a ‘hint’ – more of a reminder)
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Thank you for choosing to become a wounded healer and advocate. Our strength is our numbers, and to access that strength we need to come out of shame.
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Thank you for finding me and commenting! I am very glad you are also spreading awareness on the difficult world of mental illness and I am sorry to hear you have been targeted by the nasties! I look forward to reading more of your posts 🙂
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Thank you so much for linking my blog to yours 🙂 Very much appreciated!
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Thanks for finding me. I hope you are smiling at least once a day. 🙂 I look forward to following your life.
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Absolutely smiling! 🙂 There are so many wonderful bloggers on here! 🙂 I also have another page http://www.couragecoaching.wordpress.com which you might have seen. Have a lovey day and thanks for the follow! x
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You have obviously been doing a lot of work on yourself, and the progress you have made is evident. I grew up in a dysfunctional family, which included physical, emotional and incest. The resulting PTSD, alcoholism, and other mental health issues such as Borderline Personality Disorder, have been very difficult to find my way through. I have made a lot of progress, but the triggers still have to be identified, and the fear of abandonment still causes sometimes quite intense feelings. But at least today, I can recognize a lot of the therapy I’ve had over the past 30+ years, have definitely made a difference in my life. My therapist occasionally uses Art Psychotherapy, and the results often surprise me. I write about what it was like, how I’m affected now as well as back then, and occasionally the progress that becomes evident. I enjoy reading your blog.
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Thank you Karen. I am glad you have made so much progress in your healing journey. It is so important! Of course there will still be challenges but at least you are better equipped to deal with them now. I also enjoy reading your blog.Us survivors have so much in common, it is very comforting to have each other, although I wish it were different (that we werent abused). Maybe you might like to check out my Coaching blog..www.couragecoaching.wordpress.com
If you havent already.It is my newer venture and I also do Youtube videos now, which you might want to share with others or find helpful.
Hugs, Athina
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I will have to check out the Coaching blog. There are way too many people out there who went through some sort of abuse as children, and that is still controlling their lives. I was surprised to see how many of my followers, and those I follow, are survivors.
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It is sadly true..and abuse still happens and people cover it up whilst shaming the victims, rather than the abusers!
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let go
of it
them’
slow
i too have done
the mental autistic
bends
manic binges
and losing hinges
within
and without
and the hostile
shout
what s wrong with you?
well
dna
what do you have to say
about that!??????????????
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