This post is the last one on assertion and hopefully the most useful to those of you who struggle with being a people-pleaser and/or are quite passive in your relationships with others.There is also a YouTube video attached for those of you who are auditory & visual learners.
Here is a quick guide on how to be assertive:
- Firstly get the person’s full attention when you are trying to make an important point. This may seem like a given however it is important to ensure there are no distractions.
- Describe in an objective way, what you are having difficulty with in regards to the other person’s behaviour. EXAMPLE: ” I said I wanted to speak to you and you have just turned on the tv”.
- Express constructive feelings using ”I” statements. Don’t say ”You completely ignored me”.Instead, choose to say ” I feel upset that you are not listening…
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The third part is the most difficult, I find. I tend to focus too much at finding fault rather than expressing my need or my vulnerability. Your advise therefore is spot on!
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I am glad you found it helpful.Thanks for sharing your experience 🙂
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