I am sick and tired of hearing people minimise mine and others’ abuse..
I am really frustrated with peoples’ lack of understanding towards types of mental illness..
I am also fed up with hearing that I haven’t made enough progress in my recovery from childhood and relationship abuse, especially since I’ve been in therapy for so many years..
Firstly, those people who don’t understand the depth of trauma abuse can cause, are either ignorant, protecting someone who causes abuse or just can’t handle the truth so would rather turn a blind eye to it..
Secondly, there are also those people who actually do have empathy and witness the pain you go through every day but feel frustrated with the progress of your recovery or that they aren’t able to ‘fix you’..The frustration comes from the fact that they might always have to be the strong one in the relationship/marriage etc..because those who are recovering from abuse might be too overwhelmed, too ashamed, too afraid to set boundaries or just completely and utterly devastated..These people might be your husband or wife, who have to live with you daily and although love you deeply, also have their own difficulties and struggles and wish that at times you could instead support them…
For example, maybe your complex post traumatic stress inteferes with certain things that most people find really easy…like driving a car..Maybe driving a car is so terrifying to you, that your anxiety might actually cause an accident and make you a dangerous driver…However, your partner might be working full time and is fully responsible for both your lives, whilst you aren’t working or aren’t able to drive..This then puts unfair pressure on your partner, who isn’t mentally ill but also has limitations and gets really stressed..who might not feel like driving..
I am completely against people minimising mental illness but I am very understanding to those people who have to live with someone who has a mental illness..They also have to practice self-care, especially if they are empaths and feel deeply..
I am completely against narcissists, psychopaths/sociopaths using their ‘depression’ as a reason to manipulate, get their own way and have the world pity them..Not all mental illness is an excuse for being evil, acting with no remorse and hurting people….There is a difference…Lets not confuse the two…
There is also another side to mental illness. Mental illness becomes a disability if it inteferes with your every day life and you are unable to work or function..Again this is also ok, as depression is very tricky and it can completely take over your logic..
What is NOT ok, is when a disability is used as an excuse for almost anything..There is also a character behind every person, there is also DNA and there is also an ability to self-reflect or the lack of self-reflection..
Lack of self-reflection, lack of empathy and lack of remorse are dangerous in a ‘healthy society’.
To sum up this post, I will not tolerate the disability of people to cause harm with their pathological mental illnesses of narcissism or psychopathy, just as most people don’t tolerate evil..