I have been reading Pete Walker’s book – Complex PTSD- From surviving to thriving – as recommended by the lovely http://www.healingfromcomplextraumaandptsd.com/
This book has helped me immensely identify how often I am triggered with emotional flashbacks. It also helped me identify the 2 F types I mostly use. I am primarily a Fawn type but also have moments of Freezing..Fawn types are people-pleasers, codependents. I am no longer as bad a Fawn type as I used to be, as I am now no longer trying to please everyone. If they hurt me, I tell them and I walk away. I try not too care too much anymore about ‘fixing’ others either. I am happy to be empathetic and offer help when I see the other person wants it. I no longer allow others to manipulate my insecurities to get what they want. Years of therapy has helped me look at my reactions and negative learned behaviours and change them to a more constructive way of coping.
Freezing probably happens in moments where I am having a flashback or when I am retraumatised. It also happens when I feel threatened in a situation where I can’t escape. This happened to me during a sexual assault.
I would highly recommend this book to anyone out there who had a difficult, traumatic childhood. Its helpful to people with PTSD or CPTSD. It has helped me put the pieces of the puzzle together as to why I react the way I do in certain triggering situations.